THINGS I LEARNED IN COLLEGE

- That it didn't matter how late I scheduled my first class; I'd sleep right through it.
- That I could change so much and barely realize it.
- That college kids throw airplanes too.
- That if you wear polyester everyone will ask you, "Why are you so dressed up?"
- That every clock on campus shows a different time.
- That if you were smart in high school--so what?
- That I would go to a party the night before a final.
- That Chem labs require more time than all my classes put together.
- That you can know everything and fail a test.
- That you can know nothing and ace a test.
- That I could get used to almost anything I found out about my roommate.
- That MOST of my education would be obtained outside of my classes.
- That I would be one of those people my parents warned me about.
- That free food served until 10:00 is gone by 9:50.
- That Sunday is a figment of the world's imagination.
- That Psychology is really Biology, and that Biology is really Chemistry,
- That Chemistry is really Physics, and Physics is really Math.